Tuesday, September 23, 2008

"We Interrupt This Program..."

And now a message from Jello Biafra Enterprises and the Government Of California:

"We interrupt this program with a special bulletin:
America Is Now Under Marshall Law.
All constitutional rights have been suspended.
Stay in your homes.
Do not attempt to contact love ones, insurance agents or attorneys.
Shut up!
Do not attempt to think or depression may occur.
Stay in your homes.
Curfew is at 7 PM sharp, after work.
Anyone caught outside of the gates of their suveillance sectors after curfew
Remain calm, do not panic.
Your neighborhood watch officer will be by to collect urine samples in
the morning.
Anyone caught intefering with the collection of urine examples will...be...
Stay in your homes, remain calm.
The number one enemy of progress is questions.
Remember, national security is more important than individual will.
All sport broadcasts will proceed as normal.
No more than two people may gather anywhere without permission.
Use only the drugs prescribed by your boss or supervisor.
Shut up, be happy.
Obey all orders without question.
The comfort you've demanded is now mandatory.
Be happy.
At last everything is done for you."


Dean said...

Mmmm... urine samples...

Uncle E said...

dean, you're one sick and twisted mo-fo...you'll fit in well here.