Saturday, February 23, 2008

Die, Die My Darling

Isn’t it sad to see your favorite bands go down the proverbial crapper? Some bands have the good sense to call it quits when the creativity dries up and others dive headfirst into self parody and insignificance willingly, often tainting their legacies in the process.

Hindsight is 20-20 and the following is my own pigheaded evaluation and opinion of a few bands and artists who either got it right, or horribly wrong.

The Beatles
Lifespan 1963-1970
Virtually every album a winner, probably died at exactly the right time.
E'S VERDICT: Should of died after 8 years, which they did!

The Rolling Stones
Lifespan: 1964-Present Day.
Should have disbanded in 1978 right after Some Girls, although some would argue 1981’s Tattoo You was their last ‘Classic Album’.
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 14 years.

The Who
Lifespan: 1965-Present Day
Should have ’let go the coat’ after Moon The Loon died. 1973 was the year their last great album, Quadrophenia, was released.
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 9 years.

Lifespan: 1975-Present Day
Bon Scott was classic sleaze and the band pretty much invented the Dance Metal genre. Back in Black was great, but after that things got fuzzy. Should never have done Maximum Overdrive. 1980 was the year they should have died.
E'S VERDICT: SHould have died after 6 years.

Lifespan: 1994-Present Day
Two magnificent albums, then one bloated record after another from these boys from Manchester. Needed to give up the gig after 1995’s What’s The Story Morning Glory?
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 2 years.

Big Star
Lifespan: 1972-1974
Two near perfect albums, one mental breakdown. Like the Beatles, broke up at exactly the right moment in time.
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 3 years, which they did!.

Lifespan: 1991-2003
Parklife and The Great Escape re-defined British pop, and 1997’s self titled album was a great re-invention of their sound, but that’s where it should have ended. They limped on for another 6 years before they called it a day.
E'S VERDICT: SHould have died after 7 years.

The Clash
Lifespan: 1977-1985
After Mick Jones was sacked after Combat Rock Joe Strummer soldiered on, hiring two young punks of questionable talent and releasing the God-awful and aptly titled ‘Cut The Crap’.
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 6 years

David Bowie
Lifespan: 1967-Present Day
In all honesty, David Bowie released his last great album, Scary Monsters, in 1980. Many missteps were to follow, including the Glass Spider fiasco. Some say he’s made a comeback, I say he should have packed up his mascara in 1980...
E'S VERDICT: Should have died after 14 Years

If the above is correct, and I know it is, the MAXIMUM lifespan of a band should be no more than 7 1/2 years. There will be oddities, of course, but not many...

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